Disappointment

I spent another 5 and a half hours at the clinic today.  My potassium levels were too low, so that got added to the regimen of steroids and anti-nausea meds.  Today it all gave me a massive headache again, so there was some morphine, too.  We're also trying a motion sickness patch to try to help the nausea, too.  Sylvia and I talked quite a bit, and decided that I am just going to have to go in everyday for a week after each of the next 2 chemo rounds to get the extra drugs to try to stay out of the hospital and in some sort of fit shape to get through the days.  Lord willing I won't have to go in again until next Thursday, but I'm still fighting this massive headache, so we'll see what happens this weekend.

The big disappointment is that we'll have to cancel our trip to Branson with my parents.  I'll have to be in for infusions and extra treatments, and there is just no way we'll be able to go.  I'm praying the various places will reimburse us- the whole trip is already paid for.  We were also planning a little overnighter to Adventureland in a couple weeks that I won't be able to do.  Darrin is just going to take the boys for the day.  He is telling stories in Altoona, so they'll go to the park, he'll tell his stories, and then they'll come home.  I'll spend the day infusing.  At the start of this we thought we'd be able to do all our little trips.  Now it looks like I won't get to do any.  We are hoping to camp one night next week when Darrin tells in western Iowa.  I'm really praying we'll at least get that.

I've received some wonderfully encouraging cards in the mail this week.  The scriptures have been so perfectly timed.  Eventually I'll get thank you notes to everyone, but please consider yourselves thanked.  I'm asking God to specially bless all of you who are such blessings to me.

I am very disappointed about all the extra treatments and having to miss out on our fun summer plans.  But I am happy to say that I am not feeling too discouraged.  That is clearly God working through your prayers, because spending 4-5 hours at the clinic everyday should be discouraging.  I know we are just doing what has to be done to get through this, and that it will end eventually.  The next round of chemo drugs should be much easier on my body.  I am choosing to enjoy the time talking with my husband (today with my mom), and just enjoying being together, even though it's in a chair with lots of tubing hooked up.

Now I'd better stop writing as I am not sure how much sense my morphine and oxycodone muddled brain is making.  Go Team Robin!